How to Start Developing Skills

1) Start with the core skills

If you’re starting from ground zero, such as learning programming when you don’t know anything about coding, it can be intimidating as there are a multitude of things to learn. Start with core skills first.
  • Core skills are skills you absolutely need to succeed in your goal. They have a direct impact on your success.
  • Secondary skills are of lower importance vs. the core skills. While they accentuate your success, your expertise in them do not make or break your goal.
What determines a core or secondary skill? It depends on your goal. As long as the skill has a critical impact on your goal, it is considered a core skill. If your goal is to be a life coach with a team of sub-coaches, then life coaching, leadership, team management, and training will be your core skills. If your goal is to be a life coach with an online setup, then life coaching, web marketing, content writing, and good technical skills will be your core skills.

2) Break into little steps

With each skill, break the learning into small steps.
Back when I was learning life coaching, I identified the sub-skills that would make a good coach, including listening skills, questioning skills, empathy, and patience. I subsequently gave myself a rating of 1–10 on each skill and worked on these skills by giving free sessions, taking a coaching workshop, reading books, and most importantly, working with people. I also developed my own coaching guidebook, which is my repository of coaching concepts and frameworks to coach people. I would collect feedback and review my performance after each coaching session, including identifying things that I did and didn’t do well in, so I could improve.
Doing these steps helped me become proficient quickly. I moved from coaching 1 person, to 2, to 4, to 8, to 10 people within a few months. Soon I was coaching my 20th client, and then my 50th, and then my 100th. Before long I was seeing clear trends in my clients’ aspirations and problems and could help them in a pinpointed manner. I also became proficient where I was able to accurately analyze each client’s problems with a brief background and simple questions, and subsequently guide them out of their mental blocks.
Developing a skill can be a lofty project, so break it up into little chunks. Don’t expect to reach “master” status right away but focus on conquering each section, one bit at a time. For seemingly unquantifiable soft skills, assign quantifiable milestones to guide you. For example, if you want to cultivate networking skills, you can start by going to X new events and reaching out to X new people each week, and subsequently practice how you introduce yourself and pitch your ideas to others, iterate accordingly, and so on.

3) Learn from the best

One of the best ways to learn is to learn from the best. That’s because you can understand from someone who’s “been there done that” and get their wisdom rather than proceed unguided. Here are some tips:
  1. Who are the people you know, who have experience in this area? Approach them for advice. Ask them: How should you build your skill in this area? Do they have any tips for you? What should you watch out on?
  2. Engage a coach. Getting a coach isn’t cheap, but if you have the financial resources and you get the right coach, you can shave hundreds of hours off your learning curve. My clients, through our sessions together, have saved hundreds of hours and sped ahead in their goals, compared to if they had struggled and dealt with these issues alone.
  3. Get a mentor. Is there a senior in your company or your network of contacts who would be willing to mentor you?
  4. Study experts in the industry. Who are the experts in your field? Study them and understand what makes them so good at what they do. Model their behavior, while adapting it to fit you.

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